Wednesday, July 23, 2008

Zen and the Art of Happiness


Seven Questions with Chris Prentiss, Author of “Zen and the Art of Happiness”

Q: In your book, you reflect on the idea that everything that happens to us is the best possible thing that can happen to us. Can you talk about that?

Chris: The Universe doesn’t make mistakes. Everything is happening just as it should. It’s only our perception of difficulties that causes us the distress and the difficulty we experience. Everything that happens to us is for our complete benefit. Even if an incident hurts us, shames us, or takes something from us, it will always work to our benefit since the Universe will not let anything bad happen to itself, and we are part of “itself.”

Put another way, knowing that you are part of the Universe and that the Universe is aware, acutely aware, of you is more empowering than any other single aspect of your life. It means that the most powerful force that exists is aware of you, and it is as concerned for your welfare as it is for its own because you are its own.

Q: Why did you write this book?

To help people all over the planet to live a better life. I want to share what I’ve come to learn through years of searching and testing in my own life. We are powerful beings, but many of us have learned to think and act in just the opposite way, as if we are not in control. We do control the events in our life by the kind of personal philosophy we adopt, because our philosophy determines how we respond to events. We can learn to be happy. Events are just events. How you perceive those events and respond to them determines their outcome in your life.

Q: Can you talk about thinking in terms of good or bad and how the way we see things matters so much?

Shakespeare said it best: “There is nothing either good or bad, but thinking makes it so.” Our tendency is to see the events in our lives through our own lens and our own expectations. To change the conditions in your life, begin by changing how you see your world and how you think about what you see.

Here’s a simple example I use in my latest book. Suppose you and I decided to see a movie. We have been told it is a great thriller, the best one ever made. We go to the cinema, buy our tickets, find seats, and the film begins. We sit there looking for clues—a murder, a theft, a plot, a crime of some kind—but we don’t see any of that. After twenty minutes of watching, we are confused and baffled. It’s definitely not what we were told to expect. Nothing we are seeing makes sense. Then the person in the next seat leans over and whispers, “Isn’t this a wonderful love story?” Suddenly, everything makes sense. All the events of the film fall into place because we are seeing it for what it really is rather than what we were told it was. That’s the same kind of transformation that will occur as you start seeing yourself, the world, and its events for what they really are rather than what you were told they were.

Q: Can you talk about conditioning yourself to see beyond the events and find power in everything that happens?

Because of the way we’ve been trained, we think that some of the unpleasant things that happen to us are “bad.” But have you ever had anything happen to you that seemed really bad at the time but later turned out to be beneficial? Everyone I’ve ever posed that question to has been able to remember several events like that. Start to look at all events like that. If you can condition yourself to see that truth—that everything happens to benefit you—at the moment each event occurs, happiness will become your constant companion. And you will save countless hours, days, and weeks of useless lamenting over situations that will always turn out to be for your benefit.

I have had seemingly bad things happen to me: beatings, abandonment, lying, cheating, deception, betrayal, lost opportunities, lost money, position, power, respect, and all the thousand and one things that come into the average person’s life. As I look back on them, each brought its benefit, its wisdom, its information, its strength. A diamond is polished by grit and a man by adversity.

Q: Can you talk more about how we create events and situations?

You are always using your power to create and influence events. You’re like a radio station that constantly transmits. Whatever you broadcast goes out over the airwaves in every direction, affecting everyone and everything around you. If you’re broadcasting fear, fear is projected to everything around you, and your fear brings to you those things that are attracted by fear. If you’re broadcasting power and confidence, everything and everyone around you is affected positively, and you draw to yourself the things that are attracted by power and confidence. The conditions of your life are not the result of what is happening “out there” but what is happening inside of you

This story from my book shows the power of our beliefs. Max owned a thriving sandwich shop. People were almost always waiting in line to eat there. He gave away free pickles, free potato chips, sometimes a free soft drink, and his sandwiches were famous for being overstuffed. One day his son came to visit and told his father, “I have to tell you for your own good that you’re making a big mistake giving away all those extras. The country’s economy is in bad shape. People have less money to spend. If you don’t cut back on the free items and the portions, you’ll be in a bad way before long too.” After his son left, Max followed his advice. Before long, after many of his disappointed customers had stopped coming, he wrote to his son: “You were right! The country’s economy is in bad shape, and I’m experiencing the results of it right here in my sandwich shop!”

Q: What do you believe is the most important law in the Universe?

The most basic, most important law in the Universe is “cause and effect.” Very simply, every action produces a reaction, and the reaction is in exact accord with the action that caused it. Based on that law, you cause the effects that come into your life by how you are being at every moment. The way I like to say it is: You are the author of every next moment.

Q: In your book, you talk about stress, fear, and our imaginations. How can we begin to look at fear in a more healthy way?

One of the greatest obstacles to happiness is stress—that feeling of fear, anxiety, or foreboding. Yet many fears are born in your imagination and have no basis in real life. Beyond that immediate feeling of fear is your expectation of a bad result. If you were completely certain that the situation would turn out perfectly—in fact, to your greatest benefit—fear would be absent. You would proceed with confidence. Is fear present within the situation itself? Of course not. Without you using your imagination, fear cannot exist. So stress comes from the way you relate to situations. The next time you feel fear, imagine a beneficial outcome rather than the one that is causing your fear. Say to yourself: “The fear that I feel is aimed at my weak area so I can strengthen it. There is some information in this situation that I need, and I will get it by going through this. Even though I’m afraid, I have enough courage to act.”
END
Don't miss Chris' latest book, "Be Who You Want Have What You Want", it's brilliant, insightful and a MUST READ!

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